What does a DMT trip feel like?

DMT is a powerful hallucinogen that has inspired shamans and philosophers for a long time. Shamans used it for spiritual journeys to the proverbial “Other Side” of consciousness. More recently the drug was made famous by the writings and musings of American philosopher and botanist Terence Mckenna, who claimed to have been transformed by an experience of taking DMT, and believed that the drug provides a genuine gateway to an unseen level of existence.

A researcher named Rick Strassman was granted an exceptional permission to study the effects of DMT on the human mind. The result was the excellent book DMT: The Spirit Molecule.

This post was written by my friend “F”, by request from me. It’s a firsthand account of what taking the drug felt like for him.

Thank you, “F”, for this fascinating piece!


DMT-6

(DMT crystals)

DMT (Dimethyltryptamine for long) is a hallucinogenic drug discovered by various different ancient cultures and, used by them for ritual purposes. These cultures, however, only used the natural resource DMT that is produced by several plants, for example the Mimosa tenuiflora, or in the toad species Bufo marinus. The first method of synthetisizing N,N-Dimethyltryptamine was discovered by the Canadian Richard Helmuth Fredrick Manske (I would guess of German descent). DMT makes you see things that aren’t real, or simply alters your perception of reality.

In Wikipedia, you can find a lot about it, e.g. that it’s a hallucinogenic drug and what its chemical composition is, but I won’t get stuck on that stuff as there aren’t that many people interested in that aspect.

dmt_structure

(Chemical structure of Dimethyltryptamine)

DMT can be injected, smoked in a crack pipe or snorted. However, if you plan on taking it, you should ask what exact version of DMT you are getting, as for example only the freebase-version can be smoked just like marijuana. If you take it as Ayahuasca (the form favored by ancient shamans to induce spiritual “journeys”) on the other hand, you have to ingest another substance to stop your body from metabolizing it too fast. But, as mentioned before, you should ask your dealer about what exact kind you are getting and what style of consumption he or she recommends.

Also (and this can’t be stressed enough), don’t take any drugs from people you don’t know or don’t know enough about the drugs they are selling, and if you try something you’ve never done before, have a person with you that you trust so that he/she can handle any bad effects. This accounts for all drugs, but especially for things like LSD or DMT, because there might be lasting effects of a bad trip that could be prevented with the right help or medical assistance.

I’m supposed to be writing about my very own experience with DMT, so here goes nothing.

First of all, the trip is short – very short. It lasts only for about ten minutes and after that, it’s completely gone.

I should describe the overall picture, because when you are using any psychedelic drug it’s important to know the circumstances. I had heard about DMT 2 days before trying it, and was quite intrigued as I had two experiences with LSD before, and I am interested in hallucinogenic drugs. This was followed by a hasty bit of research on DMT and reconsidering whether I really want to try it. Two days later my best friend asked me (again) whether I’d like to smoke some with her; she had offered that two days prior, too, but I had stuff to do and wanted to educate myself further on what I am planning to consume, as psychedelic drugs are nothing to toy around with.

When I took the drug, it was roughly evening. It was winter so it was already a pitch black night outside with a cloudy sky, and a pale light where you could imagine a moon. But the environment was still very much visible because of the street lights.

We were three, sitting down on a second-story balcony and about to start smoking.

I consumed it as a freebase-version by rolling it into a joint with tobacco and marijuana, and the first thing I noticed was the taste: Do you remember your gym shoes, drenched in sweat and probably rotting in the corner, developing sentient life? Think about dragging them through a waste depot, then lighting them on fire and inhaling the fumes. It’s freaking disgusting, but once it’s down your throat, you can enjoy the warm hug of the ensuing trip.

dmt_BLUNT

(a “blunt” made of DMT mixed with marijuana)

In my mind, suddenly everything felt light and happy. I wasn’t cold anymore (despite the winter cold), and all the things I worried about felt like they were a million miles away. In general, it made me happier for the moment and made me feel safe and secure. When I looked up, all the lights were shining a little brighter and I noticed all the different particles of dust in the air. I guess you could say it enhanced my perception, but that was just the beginning. Once I went back inside again, I just sat down and stared at the floor. Everything I heard sounded like I was underwater and the visual effects also started to kick in. The effects of drugs are always hard to describe, but to try: Everything looked like it was drawn with watercolor, but the artist had used waaaaaay too much water. It seemed as there was an actual 2-3mm thick surface of water over everything, and on the borders of my field of vision the picture kept blurring and sharpening when I concentrated on it, as if the artist was gently shaking said picture with too much water.

Like I mentioned before, DMT doesn’t last very long, and after I (kind of – my knees still were a bit shaky) sobered up, I checked the clock and about 12 minutes had passed, although it felt like I had been sitting in that chair for ages.

I’ve had my share of hallucinogenics, and it’s common to have a couple of “flashbacks” after e.g. LSD, because trips like that leave a very lasting impression in the brain. For example, after my first LSD trip I had the sudden urge to go for walks in the forest more, and just in general to be closer to nature. But after the ten minute trip on DMT was completely gone, so were any thoughts or decisions I had during the time. I remember how the trip felt and all, but there were absolutely zero things that could lead back to something changing inside me or my world view/view in general during the trip.

To come to a conclusion, I would recommend DMT only for a few people: Either you have money to burn or you want to try out a hallucinogenic drug but aren’t sure whether you’ll like it or not. Because where I am living, it’s 200€ a gram and for about 4 trips with a length of ten minutes, that’s just too much money.

I feel like I should add another thing: Some have probably heard of a so-called breakthrough, something that can be achieved by taking a big amount of DMT. I didn’t have one, but one of my friends did. It’s possible, but I wouldn’t advise going for that on the first few trips, as that is something you need a bit of experience for. Just to encourage further research on your own, a guy I met once described it as “dying, then coming back to life”.

Sounds intriguing, doesn’t it?

Have a safe trip, wherever you are!

Book review: American Kingpin, by Nick Bilton. Portfolio 2017.

american_kingpin

The Deep Web is a kind of “secret” part of the Internet only reachable by a special browser called Tor. The place is basically a digital reflection of the human id: illegal pornography, weird sexual fantasies (often including rape or other crimes), sick videos – it’s all right there.

A few years ago, a new site popped up there, seemingly out of nowhere: The Silk Road, a website that facilitated the buying and selling of drugs, guns, stolen software, stolen electronics, and the like. It became a hit overnight and, considering the nature of the goods changing hands through the site, a fresh nightmare for governments and law enforcement agencies. The anonymous nature of the Deep Web and the Tor browser made finding the creator of the site that much more difficult.

Despite the challenging premise, the creator of the site was ultimately captured. He turned out to be a brilliant young do-it-yourself libertarian named Ross Ulbricht, a physics whiz kid and self-taught computer genius who believed the government should not be able to regulate what people put in their bodies. He was running the multi-million dollar drug empire from a Samsung 700z laptop, borrowing wi-fi from local coffee shops in Austin, Texas and San Francisco, California.

This book tells the story of the creation of the website, and the efforts of the various law enforcement agents (from the DEA, Homeland Security and FBI, among others) to find the person behind the “Amazon of Drugs”.

Bilton is a master storyteller, and he knows the tech and start-up worlds well, having written about both before.

The portrait he paints of the young Ulbricht is vivid and alive, the story of a young man who believes he is making a difference in the world by challenging the government on its drug laws head-on. Whatever you might think of Ross Ulbricht, he had the guts to follow through on what he believed: instead of arguing on Twitter or lecturing his friends about the hypocracy of the “War on Drugs”, he built something of his own, and left a lasting impression on the world, for better or for worse.

American Kingpin also succeeds in balancing the stories of the agents on Ulbricht’s trail with the rest of the narrative. Determined, inventive, and loyal to the very government the Silk Road challenged, they worked around the clock to dig up “Dread Pirate Roberts” (Ulbricht’s user name on the Silk Road) from the murky waters of the Deep Web. In presenting these agents as human beings too, Bilton evokes the theme of loyalty vs. rebellion towards authority, an age-old question that gets a fresh treatment between the pages of this book.

An enjoyable read that tells an unforgettable true crime story, while at the same time sophisticating the reader with regard to Internet security, digital crime, and the battle between libertarian political philosophy versus governmental institutions.

Grade: 4.5/5

 

 

 

 

Your scary experiences, Spring 2018

Once again, I made a request to my Instagram followers (instagram.com/mysteries_crimes_curiosities) to send me their creepy experiences. Here they are, presented as they were sent to me, unedited.

Thank you to everyone who contributed!


Jacquie:

So my older sister has a quinsiñera doll and its porcelain so everytime you moved her you hear a little scratch. So one time me and my sister were up till like 3:00A.M and we were laying on her bed playing a game and out of no where we hear the little scratch of the porcelain doll. As we were both scared he went to each others bed and went to sleep.

Kevin:

I was 7 and I went to throw out the garbage at 11 at night. As I was walking back to my apartment door I saw a man following me.

He kept following me for days until I yelled in my squeaky voice that he was annoying and then he simply said “ You will learn that people can be so much worse than annoying!“

I was in fear and I moved with my parents the month after.

Ezequiel:

Last Saturday in Buenos Aires there was a party of electronic music. At 3:30 in the morning a lightning bolt fell behind the stage. If it fell in the middle of the stadium we would be lamenting many dead. My friends and I left when the lightning struck. And outside, a hail storm hit us. We were terrified and I think I never felt so much that I was going to die like that day.

Here’s a video of the lightning: YouTube link

Contributor wishes to remain anonymous:

My husband and I were staying on The Queen Mary one weekend as a short getaway. We love the Queen Mary and have stayed on it before, including once for our honeymoon. This time however, when we checked in the receptionist told us that we’d have a windowless room, and asked if we would have a problem with it. Apparently it makes guests feel uncomfortable or claustrophobic. We told her it would be fine and checked into our room.

We walked around the ship taking pictures to see if we could capture an paranormal activity on film. We didn’t. The next day however, my husband took a shower while I ran to the Starbucks on board to get coffee. On my way back I was walking through the hall and heard footsteps that sounded like high heels, coming up behind me. I got to our door after speed walking, and when I looked around there was nobody in the hallway with me. I got in the room as my husband was coming out of the bathroom. I told him what I had heard. And as he was about to give me a “yeah right” the shower in our bathroom turned on. It wasn’t just a drip or a slow leak. It had turned on and my husband had to turn it all the way off.

I text my sister and mom because they are super into paranormal stuff. My sister asked what room we were in and looked up all the “haunted” rooms online. Turns out we were staying in one of the rooms with the most reported activity. It freaked us out when it happened. But then it was kind of cool to be able to tell the story at the same time.

Josi:

My husband and I have always been fans of the paranormal so when we first started dating our ideal dates involved paranormal/ horror / conspiracy type shenanigans.

I remember we had talked about using a Ouija board  but neither of us had one nor had ever used one. A friend had offered up his for us to use and experience. The night we got the board something came up and I had to go home early, leaving the board at my boyfriend’s house.

Later that night I was doing my usual stuff before bed, falling asleep fairly quickly. I usually wake up a few times at night to go to the bathroom so I’m no stranger to wandering my house in the dark, but but this instance was different. I opened my eyes and usually moonlight goes through my window and lights the room up but everything was pitch black. No outline to anything, just pure darkness. The entire room was so quiet and cold.

I tried to move to get my blanket but I was just stuck, petrified. I had heard of sleep paralysis but this seemed much more sinister. My breathing was so heavy, as if someone was sitting  on my chest. I couldn’t move, as if I were being held down by heavy chains, and in the corner of my eye, three large figures were at the foot of my bed as if observing me. I couldn’t see their faces but I knew they were three. They seemed to be darker than the darkness that filled my room.

This feeling of dread just came over me and engulfed me with such fear. I felt as if I were doomed, that I was losing everything I’ve ever loved, among other feelings I can not describe. I’m not sure out of all that I had remembered a prayer my great grandmother had taught me as a kid and so I began to say it in my head. I heard a voice in Spanish so clearly whisper in my ear: “Dont use the ouija board, return it”, and I felt this warm hug and this milky light illuminated the room. The feeling of dread was vanishing and I fell into a deep sleep.

When I woke up the next morning, I called my boyfriend to tell him we were returning the board. He agreed because he said when he brought it into his house, his mom flipped out and demanded he take it outside (she later told us her ouija story ) so he took it out and put it in his truck.

Later that night he had to take the trash out, and he lives in the woods so there’s always noise going, so he took the trash out and upon walking back he had a weird feeling someone was in his truck. He said everything got quiet and eerily still and  his dog was snarling at his truck showing her full teeth. She’s a fairly docile dog so this was out of character for her. Even weirder: he couldn’t move, he couldn’t look away from the vehicle. He was just standing there in fear. He said he felt so terrified to move, when he finally snapped out of it he turned around to go back in the house. When he stepped foot on the porch the light bulb busted, shattering little pieces of glass everywhere. He locked the doors and didn’t go back out till morning.

Needless to say we did return the board to my friend who insisted he closed it properly but who knows what would have happened if we had used the board.

Contributor wishes to remain anonymous:

I’m [name], I’m from Mexico and I’d like to share what happened to me last February.

It was my birthday on February 24th, I was in a party with my friends. Then I decided to leave the party to go to another place. I went to a friend’s house, and I was waiting for him outside of his house when a guy appeared of nowhere and asked me for a street. I said I didn’t know where it was. He stared at me and I felt uncomfortable so I moved. He pushed me through the wall and I started to scream, I thought he wanted my purse, money or something, so I gave my cell phone to him. He said “I don’t want your cellphone” In that moment he just cut my neck with a cutter and ran away.

My friend arrived and a guy on a bike saw everything so he went looking for this person. The police and the ambulance arrived and they took me to the hospital where I was told it was a miracle I was alive – he cut 15 cm of my neck, 19 stitches were necessary.

2 months have passed and I´m healing. It still hurts but I feel stronger, I feel good. This event opened my eyes in some many aspects of my life but at the same time, sometimes I feel angry, sad, scared, so many things I didn’t think it was possible to feel. So this is what happened, the day I could’ve died, it was the day I started living.

 

Holly:

So I found out once that you can just use a candle to talk to the dead instead of an ouija board. But that was a really bad idea because my house used to be haunted but a couple years ago my family realized that the ghost may have passed on (the ghost was a middle aged woman, we found out through our neighbors). And also my dad used to be a grave digger so he probably carried many spirits. So once I tried to contact someone through a candle and I forgot to say goodbye before I blew out the candle. Which means I left sort of a portal to the other side open…

The next day I was taking a nap and I thought my sister was clapping to try and wake me up but at the time my mum was up stairs and said that there wasn’t anyone up there, another thing that happened when I was asleep was that it felt like someone was bouncing on my bed but again no one was there, then a few nights later someone was literally pulling my hair and when I turned around no one was there and I was in my bedroom alone, and every couple days I get the worst cramp in my leg and I never had it before I lit that candle. I think the ghost is a child playing around but nothing has happened for a few days now but I’m not sure if the ghost is gone.

Alyssa:

So, my mom went to Wilkes University back in 1979/1980, before the Internet. At the time, there wasn’t enough housing for all the students, so the college rented out a nearby hotel, the Hotel Sterling, built in 1897, finished in 1898.

Now, my mom said there was a ghost in her room. She said all the ghost would do was sit in a chair and watch them, but both my mom and her roommate had actually seen her. My mom said the ghost was wearing old fashioned wear, probably around the 1800’s if she had to guess. They called the ghost Emma, because that was the name the ghost seemed to like. As she had only told me the other day, I decided to google the hotel and see if anyone named Emma had ever died there, expecting to get back nothing. Instead, it turns out Emma E. Sterling was the name of the woman who oversaw the building of the hotel, primarily after her husband passed away.

IG @female_snoop

My experience: was arguing with my 5 year old last week and I told her “No”. She turned around and said to me: “Mom, do you remember when you were the kid and I was the mom?” So of course I tell her “No I don’t, because I’ve always been the mom and you’re my baby. It’s been like that for 5 years.” Her response: “Well you’re wrong because I remember. . . They told you and my dad who wasn’t my dad that you had to go somewhere and when I tried to tell them they weren’t taking you nowhere they chopped all our heads off.”

Ummm… What? So I told her “No one has chopped our heads off and don’t talk like that no more”. Her last response “I didn’t say anything bad. I told you what happened when I was the mom, you don’t remember. And I do.”

That was the end. And now I can’t look at my child the same in a way.

Caroline Hochmuth (IG @carolinehochmuth):

Bro once I was watching the movie Grave Encounters 2 with two of my friends in his basement with all the lights off. During the scene where the ghosts pick up the camera and start recording the characters a light turned on in the closet across the room. Keep in mind the closet door was mostly closed, we were the only ones on that level of the house, and it was a regular light switch just inside the closet. We have no idea how it happened and weird shit still goes down in the basement anytime I house sit for them.

IG @trisarahtops1228:

About 10 years ago I was by myself in my car in traffic about to make a left turn, and out of habit I checked for traffic coming from my right. When I looked, a very good friend, Rebecca, was sitting in my passenger seat where no one had been sitting – because I was alone. She looked right at me and smiled. When I realized what I saw I looked again and no one was there, but this made me think about her and I hadn’t spoken to her in a long time, so I decided to go on her MySpace (okay maybe it was longer than 10 years ago lol) and send her a message and see how she was and what she was up to.

When I got to her page there were all these memorials and RIP messages to her! I was so confused so I contacted a girl who had been her roommate. My friend had been killed in a car accident 3 months before I saw her. I think she was telling me goodbye. I never saw her again.

Claire:

My ghost story definitely isn’t the scariest, but it’s the event that made me really question the existence of the paranormal.

There was nothing special about the night that it happened. My father and sister had gone out for dinner, and I had chosen to stay home and work on homework. To help me concentrate, I had put my earphones in and closed my bedroom door. It was about 30 minutes after my family had left the house that a muffled sound had come from the lower floor of the house (my room was on the second, for reference). I know the sounds that my house makes, and what I heard – or thought I had heard – was the door to the garage slamming shut. I had just assumed that it was my dad and sister. Maybe they’d decided not to eat after all? I yelled out “Hey!”, but there was no response. I found it kind of weird that no one replied but didn’t think much of it.

A few minutes later, I could hear footsteps approaching my room, strong enough to be heard over the classical music playing in my ears. I pulled one bud out and managed to catch the noise with a bit more clarity, and whatever was making the noise seemed to stop abruptly at my door. There were no visible shadows that I could see in the space between the door itself and the floor. When the footsteps didn’t continue on, as they probably would’ve if they belonged to anyone in my family, I began to freak out. I didn’t move from my position until later, when my dad entered my room to announce that him and my sister had come back home. I asked them if they had been at the house for a while, but they had only just arrived.

Months later, I decided to talk to both of them about the incident, and my father disclosed that he had had a similar experience when we first moved into the home. It definitely freaked me out at first, but years later, we make light of our haunted house. We even have a name for the ghost: Linda.

IG @ms.aakrity:

When I lived in Roseville California in 2017, I was always so afraid of this apartment.  I don’t know of what or what made me afraid I just had the feeling of being scared, I had the feeling that something was there.  My restroom was across the hallway just a few steps away from my room.  But I was always so mortified at night to go to the restroom.  If I did manage the courage to go to the restroom I would walk in and out as quickly as possible and not even look towards the living room.  I was so afraid that something or someone was in the living room.

While living in this apartment I also had nightmares.  Some really bizarre and scary ones. I’d be so scared that I would wake up and not want to go back to sleep.  But I was awake just shaking in my boots thinking of what was in the living room or outside my door.   In our living room we had a chimney.  I could always hear noises coming from the chimney specially at night it sounded  like wind. One of my dreams was that I had a vision of my living room.  In my dream it was dark. The chimney was on and fully lit.  There was a little boy very close standing right in front of the chimney.  I only saw his back but he was small like 2 years old.  I woke up so scared thinking that the little boy got hurt standing that close to the chimney.

Outside the restroom towards the right side there was a wall filled with cabinets for storage.  They were very big from the floor to the top. One day at night roughly like at 7 pm I was coming out of the restroom.  Outside the restroom door near the cabinets  I saw a little boy standing near the cabinets.  He was looking down, I could only see the top of his head, the forehead and hair.   I thought it was my baby boy.  I was looking at him with a big smile thinking that he was waiting for me outside the door.  But suddenly I saw my baby coming from the left side.  I was so shocked and I look to the right side but the other little boy was gone.  This happened so fast in a matter of seconds but it scared the crap out of me.  At times I thought it was the little boy from my dream, I thought that maybe he had burned in the chimney.

I remember one time I was in the kitchen cooking. My baby boy was roughly a little bit over 1 year old.  He was in the kitchen playing on the floor with his toys.  Suddenly I hear him whining, and he starts crying.  So, I look at him and he comes towards me really quickly.  I ask my baby what’s wrong but he can’t speak because he’s still very young.  But I could see that he was scared he was hiding behind my legs he was still whining and peeking towards his toys as if he was seeing something.

One night while sleeping I felt a tap on my shoulder.  I woke up and looked towards my husband thinking he had woken me up. But he was sound asleep.  I went back to sleep but the days to come I was always so afraid that someone was going to tap my shoulder again.  I used to leave the door from my room cracked open just like 1-2 inches so that when my husband left to work he wouldn’t make noise opening the door since the baby was sleeping.  Most of the time while living in this apartment I had a hard time falling asleep.  At times I would just be on my bed using my phone, other times I’d just be tossing and turning.  But I would always stare at the door.  I was so afraid that someone would open the door completely.  I was afraid that someone was outside the door watching me.

My husband is the type of sleeper that when he goes to sleep he doesn’t wake up at all during the night. He also never remembers his dreams.  He says he never dreams.  One night while playing on my phone and having a hard time falling asleep.  With the corner of my right eye I saw orbs of light towards the side of my husband.  So I turn my head towards him and he suddenly wakes up and asks “where is the baby?” I replied “he’s sleeping.” My husband got up and went to the restroom.  When he came back I asked him if he had a nightmare.  But he replied “something woke me up but I can’t remember what it was.” The next day I asked him about the incident but he had no recollection of what happened or him waking up and going to the restroom.

One night I was in the kitchen washing the dishes.  My baby and husband were already asleep.  As I’m washing the dishes with the corner of my left eye I saw something moving.  I look towards it and saw a bubble of smoke it was small like the size of a quarter.  I smelled it and and it had a burning smell and it disappeared.  I didn’t think much of it but I did get scared thinking that maybe something in the apartment was burning. But I looked around everywhere specially the electrical outlets but found nothing.

In another incident, it was late at night and I was picking up my baby’s toys.  As I’m picking up the toys I hear his train go on. This was my baby’s favorite toy.  It was a huge train 3X3 and you press the buttons and it plays music and it says the ABC and numbers.  On this day I was a few feet away when I heard it playing music.  I tried to calm myself down and kept picking up the rest of the toys but again the train started playing music.  I just got so scared left the toys and went to the room.

During the time I lived in this apartment I was studying for an exam I had to take.  I used to study at night when my baby was sleeping.  I would sit in the living room and study.  But I was always so afraid.  At times I’d be scared of looking at the reflection on the tv I thought that I’d see someone else sitting next to me.  There was always an awkward silence it’s hard to explain.  One time my sister came to visit me and after I didn’t live in the apartment anymore.  I shared with her my stories and how scared I felt living in that apartment.  My sister told me that one day when she visited me she was falling asleep and felt someone sitting on the bed.  She said she was so afraid to look but she felt very scared.

Thankfully I no longer live in this apartment.  These are the  incidents that happened to me in roughly 1 year of living there.  At times I think about it and still get the chills.  Other times I get sad because I was so uncomfortable living there.  I was always tired because of the lack of sleep and my husband is so skeptical he never believed anything I said to him.